Archive for April, 2009

What a pain!



TWO THREE DAY MIGRAINE
TWO THREE DAY MIGRAINE
TWO THREE DAY MIGRAINE

*and there wasn’t even any booze involved, DAMNIT!*

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April 30, 2009 at 9:58 pm

Don’t catch it!!


! IMPORTANT !
SWINE FLEW

I can’t be there today to calm your jittery nerves or wipe your snotty nose … so let’s just be extra careful out there, bitches!

XOXO,
Cookie

April 28, 2009 at 11:09 am 4 comments

Oh SNAP!


beyoncesux Well kids, the reviews for Beyoncé’s first real stab at opening a flick are in and let’s just say they were the teensiest smidge less than [Sasha] fierce.

And by ‘less than’ I mean the word on Obsessed is that it’s flat-fucking-out DREADFUL!
::: kind of like that ultra-hein paint job the Mighty B’s workin’ here —> :::

From the Daily News:
“Unfortunately, the whole movie seems constructed just to get the singer/actress into a knock-down catfight, shoehorning one of show business’s sexiest entertainers into a scorned-woman role.

And even then, the pay-off feels cheap.

The result is more like “Delayed Frustration” than “Fatal Attraction.” Knowles actually gets second billing after Idris Elba as Derek, a driven husband, father and VP of a Los Angeles financial firm.

Definitely worth skipping!”

OUCHIES!!

Good thing girlfriend can always fall back on her screaching singing career and churning out cheap looks for the House of Derriér

SOURCE

April 27, 2009 at 1:21 pm 3 comments

Music City Marks


sen-derrick-marks

After starting 37 games, making 114 tackles and 7.5 quarterback sacks in his three-year college career – Sen’Derrick Marks (the only Auburn Tiger chosen by any team on Draft Day *ugh*) is Tennessee Titan’s bound!

Good luck, hoss — can’t WAIT for your first NFL start!

April 26, 2009 at 12:52 pm

Prideful prejudice


Oh Alabama!
How you do amuse me with your schizophrenic, small-minded self!

The day House reps passed a resolution praising the bigoted, parochial pettiness that is Miss USA contestant Carrie Prejean was the very same day they also approved a bill adding sexual orientation to the state’s hate crimes law

HUH?!?
Ya.

State lawmakers aren’t about to give those gay old gays the same civil rights as you, me, the abusers, drug addicts, molesters and  felons out there who are free to get their ‘I do’ on … but if your gayified gayness garners aggressive behavior? Well, then they’ve got your back.
::: I hear that’s how AG Troy King likes it :::

I think it’s time for a resolution addressing the much-needed addendum to the state’s coat of arms …

alcoa

Sorry Carrie – that’s just how I was raised …

April 24, 2009 at 1:15 pm 3 comments

Happy Earth Day, Bitches!



Soak it up, sweatpea — ‘cuz tomorrow it’s back to your regularly programmed abuse!

April 22, 2009 at 10:52 am 1 comment

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