Posts tagged ‘Osama bin Laden’

Scary Communiqué FAIL

Osama bin Laden must have gotten bored picking burrs and gnats out of his beard or something ‘cuz he hooked up the camcorder again – this time calling for Israel’s imminent doom.


Ya … ‘cept nobody cares.
::: We’re just not that into you … :::

ignoreblU.S. officials dismissed the tape [TAPE?!?], saying not only is it NOT a credible threat to my boyfriend’s ascention to the Bejeweled and Golden Throne of Audacious Hopification – but that it also looked like a cheesy fund-raising effort.
::: Someone drank the ‘Terrorist Telethons are gonna be BIG in ’09’ Kool-Aid … ::

White House spokesman Gordon Johndroe said, “It appears this tape [TAPE?!? WTF?!?] demonstrates his isolation and continued attempts to remain relevant at a time when al Qaeda’s ideology, mission, and agenda are being questioned and challenged throughout the world.”
::: BOO YA, BEEYATCH!!! :::

Next week’s three-day drunken orgy of lurve for O’Baby is expected to draw adoring hoards of 1.5 million or more to the Washington – so, of course the FBI is all over anything that even remotely resembles anything remotely threateny or killy sounding.
So what’d they make of bin Laden’s celuloid commandment?

A big hot cuppa NUTHIN’, that’s what!

When asked if the tape [MF! — TAPE?!?] represented a threat to the inauguration, FBI spokesman Richard Kolko said, “We have no specific or credible threat to the inauguration.”
::: DENIED!!! Not even worth a mention of the wicked one? SO COLD!!! :::


Listen – next time just save us all your Midol moment and upload your rants to YouTube like Chrissy ‘leave Britney alooooooone’ Crocker.

That way all the little evildoer wannabes chained to the wall of the cave of wicked villainy and the 4 people in your MySpace fanclub can whack it to your totally rad terrorist gyrations of dooooooom … and leave the rest of us to go about the very pressing business of converting oxygen to carbon dioxide.

‘kay pumkin?


January 15, 2009 at 5:22 pm 7 comments

Elitist pol lambastes elitist mag’s lampoon

Ruh roh … we’ve barely finished our first cup of coffee and already we have controversy!

Seems some folks who shall remain nameless but whose initials are Everyone Running for President of the United States of America feels The New Yorker magazine went a wee bit too far with the Obama cover art for their new issue.

The illustration is called ‘The Politics of Fear’ and shows a gun totin’ Michelle and Muslim-garbed Barry doin’ the old FOX News terrorist fist jab in the Oval Office while Old Glory burns in the fireplace under a portrait of Osama bin Laden.

Too much?

Seems both The People’s Prince and Big Mac thought so.
O’Baby called the artwork tasteless and offensive and Mav said – ‘uhh, yeah, what he said.’
::: HARSH! :::
No word on what Ron Paul or Cynthia McKinney thought about it, but never fear – I’m sure the ink is drying on those rubber-stamp statements as I type.

No strangers to controversy themselves, the staff at The New Yorker defended the illustration, saying it was meant to mock right-wing depictions of O’Beautiful and his bride (and anyone who didn’t get the hee hee is just a big ol’ stupid, crybaby, poo poo head who should just shut UP already … uhh, or something like that).

“I think the idea that the Obamas are branded as unpatriotic [let alone as terrorists] in certain sectors is preposterous,” artist Barry Blitt wrote in an email to The Huffington Post. “It seemed to me that depicting the concept would show it as the fear-mongering ridiculousness that it is.”

‘Cept Blitt forgot two very important things:

1. His special brand of highbrow toon-time isn’t exactly appreciated by the masses, and by ‘the masses’ I mean folks like those West Virginia asshats who already think my boyfriend is a terrorist and seeing him jokingly portrayed as one in a cartoon is just the kind of rock-solid, irrefutable proof they’re looking for.

2. Obamamania is hopifying the entire world – and you media types are welcome to join the party and bask in the glow of Barry’s audaciousness … as long as your questions aren’t, well, too probing and you stay away from pesky topics like:
(unless he brings it up)
or race
(unless he brings it up, confirms the acceptance of bringing it up or is responding out of sheer necessity to the fact that some other entity did, in fact, bring it up)
or patriotism
(unless he mentions, visits a base somewhere or does a photo-op with a headbandaged soldier on crutches) 
or the fam
(unless he arranges for an Acccess Hollywood interview with Maria Menunos to show that down-home-y side we never get to see)
or … well, just start keeping a list, guys. It’ll be easier that way.

July 14, 2008 at 1:53 pm 9 comments

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