Posts tagged ‘fucker’

In case you didn’t know …


This is what history rewriting itself looks like:

Cheney this week: “No Iraq – 9/11 link”

Cheney 2002 – 2003: So believed there was an Iraq-9/11 link that he (and Rumsfeld) authorized the use of torture to extract evidence of an Iraq-Al Qaeda link from detainees

Cheney 2003: “Could be Iraq – 9/11 link”

Cheney 2004: “Clear link between Iraq and Al Qaeda”

… ok … maybe it’s just what shameless evil looks like.

 

History would do well to erase this motherfucker from it’s memory altogether.
If only it could …

June 3, 2009 at 10:24 am

Papa was a trolling drone …


ATTENTION WOMEN EVERYWHERE:

DO NOT FUCK WITH THOMAS FRAZIER

Seriously — don’t  do it!

Unless you had all your womanly business yanked out at least a decade ago and you’ve had your hoo-ha sewn twelve kinds of shut and your legs have been permanently fused together at the knee and ankle bones – do not fuck with, near, around, close to, in the general vicinity of or within a 50-mile radius of Thomas Frazier.

Because this meatsack can knock a bitch up with a single, furtive glance her way … or by breathing the same air … or passing her on the freeway …

And then – just like your self-respect, your freedom and your future plans – he’s OUTTA THERE!!!

Frazier is Flynt, Michigan’s answer to the question “If there was a world champion of deadbeat dads, what would he look like?”

He’d look like this fucker!!
A serial sperm donor who bounces from state to state, has fourteen children by 13 different women in Genesee County alone and owes more than $530,000 in unpaid child support.

Oh, but his years of playing the artful child support dodger came to an end late last month when karma finally said ‘Enough fuckery, douchebag!”

He was pulled over in Iowa for a broken taillight on his Mercedes Benz and wouldja take a fuckin’ look at this — in his pocket police found $5,000 in cash and plane tickets to Florida!

Shockingly, police didn’t buy his lie that the money was for child support and not the Mons Venus champagne room.
In fact, they called bullshit on all the cockamamie crap he was shoveling, threw his impregnating ass in jail and gave him the choice of doing 90 days or coming up with about $28,000 — immediately.

Which means, of course, that he’ll continue earning his ‘burden to society’ merit badge by spending a little vakay at the county’s expense.

Hopefully dickhead will get a take-charge kind of cellmate who will spend hours each day demonstrating the painful ins and outs of ill-advised copulation and ram home nightly the consequences of such irresponsibility.

… hopefully …

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April 13, 2009 at 4:36 pm 2 comments

In His name?


No NO NO!!!
That is not how you do it, you sick fuckuva twisted wackjob!
:::  … which would normally be a tag of glory but, in this case, it means you’ve summited Mt. Dumbass — plant your flag, moron! :::

Time was a barbecue sandwich and some juice after Sunday school was all it took to lure the faithful … I guess we’re doin’ it differently these days

Ugh … cue the crazy …

troy_ian_brisport_20090215174926_320_240Johnny Law over in Ohio has charged God’s little soldier, Troy Brisport, ——>
with kidnapping, ransom/sheild hostage and felonious assault for handcuffing some poor bitch, gagging her, stripping her naked then dressing her up in …
::: Nooo — it’s not that kind of story!!! :::

… dressing her up in an adult diaper while he …
::: nuh uh … not that kind either :::

… while he read Bible passages to her … for four tragically theologified days!
From the Book of Retard 8:38-19:
“For He is convinced that only an emergency dispatcher will be able to separate the supposed sinner from the sick fuckery being done in His name
at the Tamarack Creek Apartments.”

Police say the 13th Apostle picked up his victim Wednesday night in Detroit and drove her to his apartment after she told him she had nowhere to stay.

The Master’s messenger must give one sorryass sermon because, at some point, the kidnapee fell asleep, which is when the kidnapper did as the shreiking voices in his head his Lord and Savior instructed and put his prey on hardcore house arrest!
::: Who’s a kinky Christian?!? Whooooz a kinky Christian?!?  YOU are!!! :::

Rev. Gotitwrong apparently also tried – several times – to suffocate his disinclined disciple using a pillow and blanket.
::: … the power of Christ compelled him … :::

I guess giving his testimony must just be, like, way harder and stuff these days because, after all that work, Troy The Thickheaded got a major case of the sleepies and went all nite-nite.

“And the sufferer broke 20 kinds of free and ran walked stumbled into the sun light parking lot to call 9-1-1 … and it was good.” Morons 25:36-27

Have fun ministering in County, dickweed!

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February 18, 2009 at 4:43 pm 17 comments

In Bay City it’s pay up … or DIE!


Hey — way to go, Bay City, Michigan Utility Nazis!

Your black-hearted money grubbery at the pinnacle of this New Great Depression now has a body count!

93-year-old Marvin E. Schur died “a slow, painful death” after he fucking FROZE TO DEATH inside his own home — mere days after you limited his use of electricity.

Bay City’s Manager, Robert Belleman said the the city didn’t do anything wrong because the nearly century old human being owed Bay City Electric Light & Power more than $1,000. So, see? They were forced — FORCED I tell you – to freeze him the fuck OUT!

baycitymichNow, $1,000 in unpaid bills is a lot, I’ll grant you. But at some point during the accrual process wouldn’t you think there’d have been a phone call or, ooo I know – a visit to Mr. Schur’s home to check the sitch???
I mean that would have been easy considering his house is only ONE GODDAMNED MILE FROM THE GODDAMNED UTILITY OFFICE!!!!

Uh huh — a proactive approach — what about it fellas?? Ever think of that???

HAHAHAHAHA!!!!
Umm, yeah — looks like a big cuppa negatory on that one!

And it’s too bad, because, according to their website, at the close of 2008, Bay City Electric, Light & Power owned and operated utility assets of $64 million with total annual revenues of approximately $25.6 million.

Buuuut, instead of tapping their own admittedly robust resources in fine mistzvah fashion …
or getting really radical and working out some sort of payment plan …
or doing the unthinkable and asking for donations to help the poor old man …
OR – oh hell, just making the smallest of efforts to go that extra smidge and contact folks who, like, help needy elderly people??? (… like, oh I dunno – say, the ones on the list of ‘Agencies and Organizations Providing Emergency Help’ that’s fucking LISTED ON THEIR OWN FUCKING WEBSITE!!! ACK!!!)
Ohhhh no.

Instead of foolin’ with of any of that shit – the Bay City bastards did things another way.

The greedysonofabitchfuckingheartlessasshole way.

They installed a “limiter” device to restrict the use of electricity at the old man’s home

… in the middle of WINTER …

… in MICHIGAN!

The nifty little device limits the power coming into a home and, as an added bonus,  blows out like a fuse if consumption rises past a set level.

But the best part?
The power doesn’t get restored until the device is reset.

Belleman said city workers keep the limiter on houses for 10 days, then shut off power entirely if the homeowner hasn’t paid utility bills or arranged to do so.

But they didn’t have to do that in Marvin Schur’s case.

NOSIREEEE!!!!
It only took them four days to kill him, instead of the policy-mandated 10.

See, somehow, the limiter was tripped sometime between the January 13  installation and the January 17 discovery of his frozen deadness.

At the time his poor neighbors found him, the temperature inside his house was below 32 degrees and ice had formed in the kitchen and on the inside of his windows.

“It’s not easy to die from hypothermia without first realizing your fingers and toes feel like they’re burning,” said Kanu Virani, Oakland County’s deputy chief medical examiner, who performed the autopsy.

Ever the PR machine, Belleman was quick to lay blame smack DAB where you’d expect: On the neighbors!!

“I’ve said this before and some of my colleagues have said this: Neighbors need to keep an eye on neighbors,” he alibied. “When they think there’s something wrong, they should contact the appropriate agency or city department.”

Stay classy Bay City … stay classy

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ACK!!!!!

January 27, 2009 at 2:33 pm 34 comments

Inahhhhhhhhguration


I think I came three times …
… I also don’t think I’m allowed in the Circuit City on Okeechobee anymore – but they’re all going out of business soon, so who cares!!!
::: sorry your losing your jobs in this New Great Depression and all but big ups for letting this slut catch O’Baby’s speech on your wall of 1080i goodness!! :::

It was great! Just what I expected from the hot manwichness of O’Beautiful,  Jon Favreau, et al.
I mean, fortheloveofmoneygodvodka and all that is holy – I didn’t think it was possible to give that big a ‘fuck you’ to someone without actually saying the words!
::: … then again, that might just be because I only know six words :::

I caught the first one way early on!
“Forty-four Americans have now taken the presidential oath. The words have been spoken during rising tides of prosperity and the still waters of peace. Yet, every so often the oath is taken amidst gathering clouds and raging storms .”
::: … a polite one, but a ‘fuck you’ nonetheless :::

“At these moments, America has carried on not simply because of the skill or vision of those in high office, but because We the People have remained faithful to the ideals of our forbearers, and true to our founding documents.”
::: … as opposed to Dumbya and his 8-year love affair with challenging our primary founding document … so, fuck you #2! :::

“That we are in the midst of crisis is now well understood.”
::: fuck you :::
” Our nation is at war, against a far-reaching network of violence and hatred. Our economy is badly weakened, a consequence of greed and irresponsibility on the part of some, but also our collective failure to make hard choices and prepare the nation for a new age.”
::: a ‘shared’ fuck you … :::
Homes have been lost; jobs shed; businesses shuttered. Our health care is too costly; our schools fail too many; and each day brings further evidence that the ways we use energy strengthen our adversaries and threaten our planet.”
::: Fuuuuck You! :::

“These are the indicators of crisis, subject to data and statistics. “
::: Oooo — a researchified and intellectualacious fuck you! SPIFFY!! :::

“On this day, we come to proclaim an end to the petty grievances and false promises, the recriminations and worn out dogmas, that for far too long have strangled our politics.”
::: Fuck you and the Republitard good ol’ boy network that got you here … :::

“[Our forebears] saw America as bigger than the sum of our individual ambitions; greater than all the differences of birth or wealth or faction.”
::: An ‘establishment’ fuck you — sweet! :::

“For everywhere we look, there is work to be done. The state of the economy calls for action, bold and swift, and we will act – not only to create new jobs, but to lay a new foundation for growth. We will build the roads and bridges, the electric grids and digital lines that feed our commerce and bind us together. We will restore science to its rightful place, and wield technology’s wonders to raise health care’s quality and lower its cost. We will harness the sun and the winds and the soil to fuel our cars and run our factories. And we will transform our schools and colleges and universities to meet the demands of a new age. All this we can do. And all this we will do.”
::: A bit hidden, but there it is — a lipsmackin’ DELICIOUS layer of yummy ‘scientifical fuck you’ sandwiched between the action and education fuck yous … CRAFTY!!! :::

“What the cynics fail to understand is that the ground has shifted beneath them – that the stale political arguments that have consumed us for so long no longer apply.”
::: HAHAHA — now that’s just a brass balls BLATANT fuck you! GET THAT SWAGGER ON, HOT STUFF! :::

“The question we ask today is not whether our government is too big or too small, but whether it works – whether it helps families find jobs at a decent wage, care they can afford, a retirement that is dignified. “
::: Brass balls blatant fuck you² !! :::

“And those of us who manage the public’s dollars will be held to account – to spend wisely, reform bad habits, and do our business in the light of day – because only then can we restore the vital trust between a people and their government.”
::: ‘Cuz he knew we’d be gettin’ a little hungry — a tasty slice of fuck you straight from the no-oversight  TARP bailout pie! :::

“Nor is the question before us whether the market is a force for good or ill. Its power to generate wealth and expand freedom is unmatched, but this crisis has reminded us that without a watchful eye, the market can spin out of control – and that a nation cannot prosper long when it favors only the prosperous.”
::: And, with that, the Brass Balls Blatant Fuck You TRIFECTA is in play! :::

“As for our common defense, we reject as false the choice between our safety and our ideals. Our Founding Fathers, our founding fathers, faced with perils we can scarcely imagine, drafted a charter to assure the rule of law and the rights of man, a charter expanded by the blood of generations. Those ideals still light the world, and we will not give them up for expedience’s sake.”
::: 911 911 911 fear fear fear war war war Fuuuuck YOU! :::

“Recall that earlier generations faced down fascism and communism not just with missiles and tanks, but with sturdy alliances and enduring convictions. They understood that our power alone cannot protect us, nor does it entitle us to do as we please.”
::: How about a little ”diplomacy’ finesse with a some ‘torture IS illegal’ on the side to go with your fuck you?!? :::

Suck it naysayers — he brought it, he bought it — he owns it.

And Dumbya?
Well, I got my guffaw on when – in the absolute LAST possible moment of his entire presidency – it was his own lousy appointee, John Roberts, who misquoted the presidential oath of office.

How symbolic.

BUH BYE NOW!!!!!

PHOTOS: Reuters, AP

January 20, 2009 at 9:08 pm 16 comments

FYI – this is what a credible threat looks like


We point and laugh now when Osama bin Laden emerges from his cave of wicked villainy just long enough to issue a murderous edict, test his Panzerfaust 3 or order some yummy Chinese takeout — but when some douchebag Cheesehead loser gets all threateny regarding my boyfriend well, THAT is some shit you just know we’re gonna check three thousand kinds of out!

Wisconsin’s own greasy Propecia posterboy – Steven Joseph Christopher – was taken into custody by the Secret Service in Mississippi yesterday and charged with threatening to assassinate The People’s Prince for what he claimed was “the country’s own good.”

steven-joseph-christopherAuthorities said numbnuts made the threats against O’Baby on January 11 and 15 on the Web site http://www.alien-earth.org.

“Yes, I have decided I will assassinate Barack Obama. It’s really nothing personal about the man,” dipshit said. “But I know it’s for the country’s own good that I do this.”
::: Can you say delusional-loser-with-significant-self-esteem-issues-and-a-raging-case-of the-‘I-am-somebody’s’???  I CAN!!! :::

An affidavit from Secret Service Special Agent Kelly Adcox quotes wannabe murderboy as saying he’s not making these dumbass threats because of racism or anything wicked or sinister like that — oh no — he’s no racist, so pay nooooo attention whatsoever to his totally unbigoty ‘Fuck You, Jew’ YouTube clipette.
::: Apparently prejudice is the ‘New Black’ … :::

No one seems to know for sure what the fuck this fucking idiot was doing in America’s Armpit at the time of his arrest, but online court records in Wisconsin — which is like so not Mississippi and stuff —  show someone with three first names and with the same birthdate as chowdahead was charged last February in Wisconsin with knowingly violating a domestic abuse restraining order.

After viewing his Youtube Psychoanalysis of You video – it’s pretty clear that Wisconsin paid the Southern Whorestate to take him in, give him shelter and a camcorder so that when his eventual arrest DID happen it would be with a Mississippi dateline.
::: Well played Wisconsin! Well played! :::

Dumbass also used his online postings to solicit funds for bus fare — which everyone knows is  THE preferred travel method of hitmen, assassins and general ne’er do wells worldwide — to Washington, D.C.

“And I’ll need a leak in the secret service to get a close up shot, somewhere close to the podium, since I’ve never fired a gun, so I need to an easy shot off. Wattdysay fellas? Any help?”

Poor Stevie – you just know he’s sitting in his padded cell, drooling uncontrollably while picking lint from his belly button and wondering where it all went wrong … just how – OH HOW GOD HOW – his foolproof plan could have gone so horribly awry.

January 17, 2009 at 3:18 pm 20 comments


This is the shit you bitches are reading


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