i … can’t

January 31, 2011 at 4:06 pm 5 comments

That’s it everyone.

The ninth letter of the English alphabet is officially no longer available.

As in off limits.
As in shut down!
As in gone!!
As in you can’t have any!!!
::: take that Apple! :::

And you can thank John Frederickiii for it. —–>

Frederiickiii got all ‘mine, Mine, MINE’ with the third vowel, stole all the i‘s from the Burpee Alphabet Seed Catalog, made like TruGreen® and fertilized his last name with the dotted one twenty-leven times – permanently leaving the soil of life BARREN of i for everyone else.


Frederiickiii’s offensive maneuver’s against the ABC’s came to light when he was diagnosed with a scorching case of stupid after being caught driving around town with unconcealed contraband in the car.

After getting a gander at his license, I hope the cops were all curses and GRRRs they could only smack Frederiiickiiii with traffic, open container and possession charges instead of dispensing REAL JUSTICE by hauling his ass into Small Letter Court to have this egregious offense adjudicated.

I bet they were.
I know I would have been.
If I could …

Entry filed under: blogging, comedy, community, crime, culture, education, entertainment, fun, funny, government, humor, law enforcement, life, Uncategorized.

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  • 1. writechic  |  January 31, 2011 at 4:22 pm

    I hate this guy. Melssa has been deprived of its sexy. 😡

  • 2. lifeisacookie  |  January 31, 2011 at 4:54 pm

    I know, right?! Who does he think he iiiis?

    • 3. writechic  |  January 31, 2011 at 4:56 pm

      And you’v gon from cookie to cooke. That’s work!

      • 4. writechic  |  January 31, 2011 at 4:56 pm

        and I can’t fucking spell anymore. 😉

  • 5. lifeisacookie  |  January 31, 2011 at 6:35 pm

    And cook(e) is one thing I DON’T do! That is Mr. Cook(e)’s job! LOL

This is the shit you bitches are reading

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