Happy Layoff To You, Happy Layoff To You!

April 7, 2010 at 10:02 am 6 comments


Old and busted: Surprising the birthday girl with streamers, balloons and cake on her special day
New Hotness: Surprising the birthday girl with the prospect of being laid off on her special day

A certain green-eyed girl I know is about to have a birthday.
A very important birthday.
A 29th birthday which, as we all know, is the true and undeniable symbolic end to the folly and childlike innocence drunken nonstop insanity of youth … which, as we all know, calls for a party with streamers, balloons and cake.

HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!
NOT THIS TIME, BIOTCH!!

[NAME REDACTED],
Please be advise you are required to attend a confidential meeting on Tuesday, April 13, 2010 in the HR conference room.  Your manager will advise you of the meeting agenda on that date.

Regards
[NAME REDACTED]
Human Resources Employment Manager

HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!

Ohhhhh, let me just tell you there is NO joy quite as joyously joyful as the act of freaking a friend’s shit so bad that every drop of blood drains from her face in less than a nanosecond!!

HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!
GOOD TIMES!

But the best part isn’t even the wickedly FANTABULOUS HR prank – which, as we all know, is HELLAMEGAYEAH great.
Nope.
The best part was her hubster’s advice:

“I think that no matter what you should wear a party hat to the meeting. That way if it is a birthday thing then you’ve shown them that you weren’t fooled.

If, on the other hand, it is a firing – they simply cannot fire you … not wearing a birthday hat.

And if it is a departmental downsizing then they’ll want to keep you because you’ve obviously got the best attitude … you know … wearing a party hat to the down sizing.”

ÜBERHELLAMEGAYEAH!!!!!

Party City here I come!!!

*smooches girl*

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Entry filed under: blogging, comedy, community, culture, fun, funny, Gossip, humor, life, Uncategorized. Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , .

God is Hate? It IS easy being Green!

6 Comments

  • 1. writechic  |  April 7, 2010 at 2:44 pm

    Payback would be a bitch….named Melissa. 😈

  • 2. thecookie  |  April 7, 2010 at 2:57 pm

    But you know — so creative, no?
    Evil but creative 😉

    • 3. writechic  |  April 7, 2010 at 5:45 pm

      Yes, evil and creative. A prank best played on someone other than me. 🙂

  • 4. thecookie  |  April 7, 2010 at 10:01 pm

    I’ve made a note of that!!

  • 5. Ric  |  April 10, 2010 at 12:13 pm

    Evil women! The best kind!

  • 6. sprindaddy  |  April 16, 2010 at 3:29 pm

    Party hats are the way to go…..


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