Put the brakes on breakfast, bitches!

November 19, 2009 at 11:05 am 3 comments


The pancakes are pleased and the muffins amused but you can bet your sweet ass the ankle-biters in your abode are gonna be 12 shades of WAAAHHHHHHH when they find out about the nationwide waffle shortage.

!!!!! WAAAHHHHHHHFLE SHORTAGE !!!!!

That’s right, ‘rents – it’s time to push the panic button!
::: oh noes!!!!! :::

The Kellogg Company announced the awfulness and blamed the batter cake blight on “a confluence of events” — including Listeria monocytogenes [Mmmm Mmmm good!] that forced its Atlanta manufacturing plant to be shuttered for some serious sanitizing and then wouldnchajustnkowit – freak flooding at the same facility just as they were ready to resume production. 😦
::: timing is everything :::

Kellogg flak Kris Charles conceded, “Flooding at our Atlanta facility as well as equipment issues necessitating extensive enhancements and repairs at our largest waffle bakery facility.”

Oh, but it’s ok.
I’m sure they’re on it.
I’m sure they have a plan!
I’m sure they wouldn’t just wing it when it comes to a full-scale waffle washout!

“We are working around the clock to restore Eggo store inventories to normal levels as quickly as possible,” Charles said in crystal clear industry insider codespeak which, loosely translated, means ‘the chances of Joe Consumer gettin’ those griddle goodies at his local grocery are about the same as Palin getting a Pulitzer’.
::: Hi Slim! Meet NONE! :::

Hmmm … maybe it’s time to crack open that container of Kashi?
… just sayin’ …

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Entry filed under: blogging, community, dining, entertainment, fun, funny, health, humor, life, News, Uncategorized. Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , .

WORD! Idiots on the air

3 Comments

  • 1. GreenEydGrrl  |  November 19, 2009 at 9:01 pm

    I am partial to the work “Jackbag”

    • 2. GreenEydGrrl  |  November 19, 2009 at 9:04 pm

      ACK! wrong post…

  • 3. lifeisacookie  |  November 19, 2009 at 9:06 pm

    HAHAHA — I am so using that tomorrow because I just saw the PERFECT pair for that phrase!!!



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