A teaspoon of *&#!!* helps the medicine go down

November 5, 2009 at 11:06 am 2 comments

Just occasionally, every now and then, you run across a story highlighting a shining, glittery human example of class, compassion and composure.

This is not one of those.

This is a story highlighting outrageous idiocy, indignation and irritation of epic proportions.
You know, the kind of shit we LOVE here at LIAC!!

Subway riders got a little girl-on-girl action this week, but not the kind you get to use your safe word with.
::: sadz :::

Two bitches got their brawl on while rolling southbound on New York’s D train because one of them didn’t think covering her cootie-spew was worth a good goddamn.

Which is the precise moment in time when Patty Pandemic piped up that Holly Hacksalot better wrap her disease-ridden trap the next time she felt the urge to expectorate all over the gat damn place!

And the piping persisted as perturbed Patty’s pissiosity precipitously progressed!
::: If you’re reading out loud – you prolly shoudda covered your mouth on that line! Just sayin’ :::

She “continued to yell at the cougher, berating her until she reacted, beginning to curse back,” one witness said. “It escalated, and the accosting woman yelled ‘get the conductor!'”

Eh, but no one did.
And why would they really?
Ringside fight tickets ain’t cheap, yo!

As the train pulled into the station, Holly Hacksalot had had enough – so she did what anyone with no manners or sense of decency, civility or style would do.
She spat ol’ Pat with her gak-filled spew.
::: cue the eww :::

Which is when Patty did just what you thought she’d do by promptly getting her punch and pull on.

“Then the cougher attempted to exit the train as the doors were opening, but the second woman grabbed her by the back of the hair, violently yanking her down to the floor.”
::: Hackey SACK! :::

But, alas – the fun couldn’t last forever and eventually those tricks would go their separate ways … to infect and abuse entire and whole new audiences.
::: That SNOT right!:::

But Holly better watch her step the next time she gets a hankering to hawk one up because the other passengers had Patty’s back on subway scuffle, remarking that Hacksalot “wasn’t even covering her mouth,” [hate that ho] and that they could have cold decked the cougher too because, after all, “that swine flu is treacherous.”

So what have we learned today kiddies?
Manage your malaise or prepare for payback.

We all ok now?
Good. Now go wash your hands. 😉


Entry filed under: blogging, community, culture, entertainment, fun, funny, Gossip, health, humor, life, Uncategorized. Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , .

Even puppets get it … Pucker up, Buttercup!


  • 1. writechic  |  November 7, 2009 at 7:35 am

    Yeah, I need a bath in anti-bacterial soap now. For ewwwww.

    I think if someone hacked a cob on me, I’d toss my cookies (no relation). 😉 Wouldn’t have the stomach to fight. (‘sides riskin’ arrest ain’t very Generation X-ey. It’s so Boomer.)

  • 2. noni  |  November 7, 2009 at 2:20 pm

    That generally holds true for me as well, WC but I think in the event of true hockage I could throw down 😉

This is the shit you bitches are reading

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