Whatever gets you through …

April 9, 2009 at 3:54 pm 7 comments

Ever had one of those days when a diversion chock-full of healthy ackhilariosity and fortified silliation isn’t just welcome … it’s necessary?

Well, I had one of those bad bitches yesterday and let me just tell you — drinking will definitely bring the ahhhhh, but investing in the unusual, unnecessary or undeniably degenerate  is what will really cut the shyte!

It’s totally theraputic!

Sometimes it’s supplies for sexy times from Sassy Kat, sometimes I just want a taste of Teavana’s ambrosial offerings and sometimes I need a double dose of ethnic chic that only Soul Sistah can supply.

believeingodBut for days when everything seems to be turned upside-down on a sideways hill in the rain there is only one option.

Perpetual Kid

My absolute 100% all-time FAVORITE ‘get fun shit’ place on the planet, Perpetual Kid caters to the functionally crazy like no one else.
::: Just like the Sharpie standing watch over my desktop pen army … Perpetual Kid speaks to me. :::

No day is complete without gettin’ my God on with some piously pepperminty breath spray and adding a little ba-da BLING to my boo boos is the bomb! And can I just tell you? My dead body towel has never failed to provide a quiet day at the beach.

Make some Tic Tac Toast; munch some Ugly Little Bitch mints or slip your best girl some “Birth Control” – whatever!

The point is that this crap has kept my funkatated ass from going twelve kinds of Chris Brown on folks more than once … and because I am getting a slight kickback for this post care — DEEPLY — about your well-being, I am sharing this time-tested strategerie for solutionizing your sanity.

I mean, it’s gotta be a better use of your money than bail, right? Right? …

Entry filed under: advertising, blogging, comedy, community, culture, entertainment, fun, funny, Gossip, humor, life, media, odd, unbelievable, Uncategorized. Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , .

CNN tackles the tough stuff O’Baby can’t bee too careful


  • 1. springdaddy  |  April 9, 2009 at 6:04 pm

    Holy Crap!!!!!!! She did it in record fashion. Sweet butternut ice cream, Cookie!
    Now you got me feeling all Perpetual Kid-Rocktastic. I’m goona grab me a bottle of hooch, kiss my pooch and Carpe Diem this Godly day!
    Bow to the sinsay everyone…….~~~~~~ :O

  • 2. Ponchita  |  April 9, 2009 at 6:28 pm

    OMG! I will have to get back to you on this one! Freaking KUDOtastic on the trifecta. Cookie – you are my god of words. I’ll be back though…this shyte is fuunnnyyy!

  • 3. Ponchita  |  April 9, 2009 at 6:43 pm

    It’s buttah baby, pure buttah!
    I was having what started out to be a shitfest of a craptastic day…but you made me laugh my ass off with this one.

    I told Springdaddy you should write a book – like a daily devotional of blogs!

  • 4. lifeisacookie  |  April 9, 2009 at 8:03 pm

    haha — well thanks! I do love me some Perpetual Kid though — I’ve raided my Savin’ To Fight Terrorism coin bank more than once for their goodies!

    And oh — I must confess — I have been trying to find the right vehicle for your words for a week or more, Ponchita! Funkatated may have to go in the hall of fame — it’s special like that. You can’t just slap that word on any old screed!

  • 5. Legal Highs  |  April 10, 2009 at 2:15 am

    thanks for that, just what I was looking for

  • 6. Ponchita  |  April 10, 2009 at 5:18 pm

    oh and by the way..thank you for this blog, because they have some hilarious stuff on that page. they will be getting some of my money very,very soon!

  • 7. lifeisacookie  |  April 10, 2009 at 6:05 pm

    I love the happy childhood memories breath spray!!!
    I gave that to my nephew for Christmas (precisely because he’s too young to ‘get it’ … YET!)

This is the shit you bitches are reading

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