Hillbilly Hicksquad 1 – Wascally Wabbits 0

January 25, 2009 at 8:23 pm 15 comments

A report of gunfire within city limits sends the police running to a wooded area near Titusville, Alabama.
::: Oooo gunfire — that sounds SERIOUS!! ::: 

“We saw four males and they started running,” said South Precinct Sgt. Gary Clark
::: Evasion tactics! WOW!!! :::

“When we caught them, they had a shotgun and bag full of rabbits.” 
::: … a bag fulla… uhh, whuh?!? :::

Oh sure, it’s against the law to fire a gun within the city limits and all and I’m sure the folks living in that neighborhood had nooooo problem whatsoever with the moonlight morons ‘cuz the kindly poeleece mayun said the bunny blasters didn’t know they were breaking the little ol’ law by gettin their Elmer Fudd on — so no harm no foul, right?!?
::: uhh, technically … I guess? ::: 

“It was tense for a moment because we didn’t know what we had,” he  said. “… it was a good thing that they weren’t shooting somebody.” 
::: HAHAHAHA — you said it, Sarge! Can you imagine?!? A bag full of … oh I dunno, dead baby or something?!? HAHAHA – good thing indeed!!! ::: 

One man had an outstanding warrant and *SHOCK* was taken into custody – but the others were allowed to leave and take their bag full of dead bunny on home.
::: Sumpin’ fer thuh missus, Yee-HAW!!! ::: 

“Country boys — that’s all they were,”  the kindly poeleece mayun said.
::: prolly MY dumbass rellies ::: 

I guess we have to assume the good ol’ boys had a good ol’ hunting license and didn’t go over their good ol’ kill limit of 8 … eh, whatevs – season ends February 28, boys — better git ta gittin’!!

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I Concur! … and that’s why they call it the ‘boob’ tube


  • 1. Chris  |  January 25, 2009 at 9:06 pm

    LMAO! I hadn’t heard from Uncle Jim Bob Billy Joe for a few days. I wondered where he done went off to. Guess it’s time to take them thar CB radios to the pawnin shop again and go bail his ass out.

  • 2. Michele  |  January 25, 2009 at 9:08 pm

    ::: prolly MY dumbass rellies :::

    ROFL!! Are you related to me??

  • 3. writechicpress  |  January 25, 2009 at 9:45 pm

    Guh. You make me laugh!!!

    And for those not from these parts…that town is pronounced…ahem,


  • 4. curious  |  January 25, 2009 at 11:38 pm

    any of you city-trash ever had rabbit stew? how about coon? and that’s raccoon, not big eared presidents. what about turtle? black bear? i know there’s lots of recipes for cat but they really aren’t fit to eat.

  • 5. lifeisacookie  |  January 25, 2009 at 11:44 pm

    yes,Big C! And I can confirm they all taste like chicken (except for raccoon and bear,which taste like beef and, umm BEEF, respectively (not sweet like deer or goat) – but my post wasn’t on the merits of off-kill … really …

  • 6. curious  |  January 26, 2009 at 12:01 am

    did you kill it and cook it or did it come from a farm and served in a fancy eatin’ place?

  • 7. lifeisacookie  |  January 26, 2009 at 1:32 am

    No — my boyfriend at the time did. He also cooked some squirrel for me and possum.
    Does it not count unless I kill it?

  • 8. curious  |  January 26, 2009 at 1:53 am

    fair enough. you don’t have to kill it but no fancy chef can cook like a good ol’ boy, or as tom brokaw would call us ‘take that you rednecks’. that no talent bastard

  • 9. lifeisacookie  |  January 26, 2009 at 10:48 am

    You crack me UP — we’re talking about food and somehow, some way you manage to work in a Tom Brokaw slap … now that is some kinda talent …

  • 10. curious  |  January 26, 2009 at 1:19 pm

    food is very political cookie. didn’t you know that? and that no talent, rump ranger, tom brokaw is a sorry bastard. his words only confirmed that his agenda was more important than the news for the last 40 years.

    GO RUSH!

  • 11. lifeisacookie  |  January 26, 2009 at 1:35 pm

    RUSH?!? Talk about your no talent fat bastards! Blech!

  • 12. curious  |  January 26, 2009 at 2:42 pm

    15-20 million listeners a week and $100 million contracts. hmm. thats more than the whole MSNBC

  • 13. curious  |  January 26, 2009 at 2:44 pm

    thats more than the whole MSNBC cast’s salry

  • 14. springdaddy  |  January 26, 2009 at 3:47 pm

    In my parts we have the famed wild hogs to hunt and eat……yum..yum! The city slickers that have moved into the area are all up in arms about these “terrible creatures” but really they’re fun to chase, shoot and cook a whole day before eating heartily with your fingers.

  • 15. curious  |  January 26, 2009 at 5:13 pm

    i think the city folk are more of a problem than the hogs. hell, i would rather have a rattlesnake farm next to my house than a bunch of floridians. at least you know what to expect from a rattlesnake.

    i’m just rambling here, but its what i’m good at. remember when the russians stormed that church the muslims took over several years back? i thought it was the coolest thing when they wrapped those camel jockeys in pig carcasses when they buried them. thats almost a cool as a big plate of bacon at shoneys 🙂

This is the shit you bitches are reading

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