Slapped in the face by OBVIOUS

January 7, 2009 at 4:44 pm 10 comments


snapshot-2009-01-06-19-17-45Fresh off my most excellent SITE OF THE WEEK super-mega-ultra glue-sniffing endorphine high – I went running, y’all!!
::: … when the bottle’s empty and you’re out of sniffy snax there’s not much else to do except crank out some junk miles … :::

Sweating out the Stoli toxins was just what I needed to clear the mental clutter before my daily ritual of hyper-caffeinated newsiferous updatification!

* ) Some dumb bitch is suing ‘cuz another dumb bitch called her a skank
::: if it walks like a skank and talks like a skank … :::

* ) Crappy schools in Georgia are asking teachers to return their equally crappy ‘raises’
::: … because the children are our future … :::

* ) Hospital leaves part of knife in woman’s head
::: Now THERE’$ your law$uit!! :::

* ) Study: Exercise Won’t Cure Obesity
::: OMG! OMG! DUH OVERLOAD!!!!!… :::

Seems some Loyola University doodooheads suffering from a severe case of Publish or Perish Fever felt their wisest course of action would be to retread the already very, very, very, very, VERY well-trodden ground of  investigatory weight-loss researchification.
::: Ten-Yur! Ten-Yur! :::

And what, pray tell, were the shocktastically shockingly shockworthy findings of this groundbreakingly original investigation???

“Evidence is beginning to accumulate that dietary intake may be more important than energy expenditure level. Weight loss is not likely to happen without dietary restraint,” said a Loyola nutritionist who really needs to leave the Ivory Tower and mingle with the masses every now and then.

WILL HUNTING MOMENT OF TROOOTH!!!

Ya wasted a year an’ dropped two-hundred grand on a fuckin’ study ya coulda got for a dollah meal deal at fuckin’ McDahnolds, bitch!

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10 Comments

  • 1. springdaddy  |  January 7, 2009 at 5:50 pm

    Yikes!!!!! The picture of that burger bustin kid gives me the heeby-geebies…..But, dayum some MikeyD’s fries sound good right now..LOL!

    Too much research. Not enough practical thinkin.

  • 2. writechicpress  |  January 7, 2009 at 6:03 pm

    Springdaddy, The chubby boy is disturbing. His arms look like ginormous sausage links.

    ::shudder::

    And dang, Cookie, talk about superific synchronicity. I just declared Punch a Priest Day after reading a little ditty for the unemployed written by the Church of England. It’s called Prayer on Being Made Redundant. Had to gnash some Anglican ass.

  • 3. lifeisacookie  |  January 7, 2009 at 6:20 pm

    copied and pasted from your bodacious blog:

    What.
    The.
    HELL?!?!?

    That is so insensitive I can’t believe it!!!!

  • 4. writechicpress  |  January 7, 2009 at 6:30 pm

    Video of feeding the hungry would have been much better PR for them…and I don’t mean feeding Little Mister Sausage Arms.

    And seriously…I love St. Francis’ “Make Me An Instrument of Peace” poem. I was expecting something lovely and was aesthetically suckerpunched.

  • 5. lifeisacookie  |  January 7, 2009 at 8:18 pm

    They’re offensive, small-minded little men in costume robes … not unlike the klan!

    *woops — was that offensive?!? 😛

  • 6. MommyCity  |  January 7, 2009 at 10:18 pm

    Hmmmmm

  • 7. MommyCity  |  January 7, 2009 at 10:20 pm

    Ooops … That last comment was a link BTW. I was too busy salivating at the thought of some hot, greasy, tasty fries. Then I remembered we were talkin’ about MickeyD’s so they’re just gonna be greasy & floppy.

  • 8. lifeisacookie  |  January 7, 2009 at 11:01 pm

    steak and shake shoestrings – mmmmmmm

  • 9. writechicpress  |  January 7, 2009 at 11:02 pm

    AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! LMAO when link popped up.

  • 10. MommyCity  |  January 8, 2009 at 5:15 am

    Oh man Cookie! Now I’ve got a REAL craving. I love me some steak & shake fries with cheese!!!

    LOL Write… He was the first thing that came to mind when I saw Mr Sausage Arms


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