Now that’s just … COLD!

November 16, 2008 at 6:55 pm 9 comments


I woke up this morning and experienced a sensation I haven’t felt in a year or more.
I almost couldn’t put my finger on it.

This feeling … this foreign sensation … it seemed familiar but … could it be?

YES – I KNEW WHAT IT WAS!

I felt …
::: wait for it :::

… a chill.

Now, don’t get me wrong. We did have cool weather a couple of weeks ago — cool enough to open all the windows and give Mother Nature a rare welcome inside our South Florida home.
::: as well as Mrs. Annoyed Neighbor Crybaby Whineyhead … :::

But this was more. This was MUCH more!

Confirmed by weather.com, The Weather Channel, the crack meteorological crew over at WPTV and some douche outside this morning screaming ‘Goddammit Charmie! Get in this house! … It’s fuckin’ frigid out here … fuckin’ dog …’  — we’d had an actual, bonafide, break-out-the-blankets overnight COLD SNAP.

THIS would change everything!
::: Oh happy I’m-not-gonna-sweat-my-ass-off day! :::

And the best part? The thermometer isn’t scheduled to crack the 80-degree mark for a week and a half.
::: WHEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!! ::: 

A week and a half, people!
Ten gloriously gelid days of sweatshirts, sweaters, long pants, comfy flannel jammies and the crown jewel of cold-weather attire … closed-toed shoes!!!!

Ohmigod
OhmiGOD
OHMIGAWD!!!

I can take this week’s pedicure money and blow it on booze!
I can drive with the windows down and sing to more than just the rearview mirror for a change!!
Heck – I may not even have to put ice in my wine!!!!
::: I’m classy like that :::

FAB-U-LASSSTIK!!

I’m gonna go test that last thought right now …

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9 Comments

  • 1. noni  |  November 16, 2008 at 10:14 pm

    Is that for real? Weather in the seventies is considered winter?

  • 2. curious  |  November 17, 2008 at 1:28 am

    nice! we had our second snow of the season early this morning. global warming my behind…

  • 3. lifeisacookie  |  November 17, 2008 at 11:08 am

    SNOW?!? ACK — I haven’t seen that stuff in 15 years — I think my heinie would fall off!
    And yes, Noni — I am being VERY for real when I say it is cold here!! The high today is 73 degrees — whoa! I have my yummy black cashmere sweater on — YAY!

  • 4. curious  |  November 18, 2008 at 1:13 pm

    algore and bobby kennedy jr must be throwing the jet stream off track running around in their private jets while we are being told to ride bicycles. but they are just trashy enviroMENTAL whores in my book. nothing more than jesse jackson style extortionists of the environmental movement.

    it’s supposed to be upper 50′ and low 30’s this time of year and not low 30’s and mid teens. we had snow again this morning. grrr!!! i will never get my watermellons planted. maybe i will invest in jheri curl. i hear it’s coming back.

    hey cookie, what is the closest relative you can marry/shack up with and still be socially acceptable? does it make make a difference if you live in a single wide or double wide? how about indoor plumbing vs. an out house? i’m going to a family reunion next week and just thought i would ask. take care

  • 5. lifeisacookie  |  November 18, 2008 at 10:46 pm

    Curious! Are you agitatin’ again you hot tater of lurve???
    It’s got to be the cold weather … but I can help you on that last bit:
    1.) Second cousin once removed (on your first cousin/wife’s side)
    2.) Absolutely — the caste system is everywhere!
    3.) Always go indoors if you can and if you’re forced outside leaves are NOT acceptable

    SMOOCHES!
    XOXO

  • 6. curious  |  November 19, 2008 at 6:46 pm

    cookie, maybe you and i should get together and write a book on southern family reunion etiquette and other humorous observations. we could give lewis grizzard a run for his money. i wish he were still around. probably the only thing worth reading in the atl rag in the last 40 yrs…

  • 7. lifeisacookie  |  November 20, 2008 at 4:59 pm

    you know, I bet the research on a book like that would be some kind of fun …

  • 8. curious  |  November 21, 2008 at 12:33 pm

    more snow… guess we are moving into a new ice-age

  • 9. lifeisacookie  |  November 21, 2008 at 2:24 pm

    See — now you’re just rubbing it in …


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