Waiting to Express Mail
“We are mothers and fathers. And sons and daughters. Who every day go about our lives with duty, honor and pride. And neither snow, nor rain, nor heat, nor gloom of night, nor the winds of change, nor a nation challenged, will stay us from the swift completion of our appointed rounds. Ever.”
The United States Postal Service is considering cutting as many as 40,000 jobs nationwide — the first layoff in USPS history.
You know what this means, yes?
It means none of us are safe.
It means it’s really, truly time for Defcon 5-style panic!
It means it’s gonna be like standing in the gozillionth layer of hell just to mail off grammy’s holiday honey ham!!!
I’m serious!! They better have the S.W.A.T. guys in full tactical gear ready on standby at post offices from Pom Bitch to Boca – because this, my friends, will get ugly!
Trust me – Q-Tips bakin’ in the noonday sun does not a pleasant postal experience make! Sylvia, Mortie and the rest of the Century Villagers are MEAN little people when they don’t get service – chop CHOP!!
“Didjah see thaaat, Mowah-tee? Sheez goht tooh mehnee pehakajez! Gawd – theh nuhrv! Why Ai Neh-vah!”
Entry filed under: blogging, entertainment, fun, funny, Gossip, life, News, odd, Politics, unbelievable, Uncategorized. Tags: Century Village, Christmas, comedy, economic crisis, economy, family, Florida, food, grandma, ham, holiday, holidays, humor, layoffs, News, people, random, sad, sarcasm, satire, stereotype, thoguhts, unemployement, united states postal service, usps, wait.