Wishful thinking

April 22, 2008 at 9:51 pm 4 comments


Charles BarkleyPolitics – it’s not just for out-of-touch elitist assholes (or liars or crooks or child touchers or drug users or hooker-hirers …) anymore!

Sure, we laughed at the Obama-Clinton steel-cage wrestling deathmatch (VF, btw) and got a chuckle imagining Cindy’s Botox goin’ bad after Big Mac called her the C-word on a campaign stop and goodness knows the Shrubster is a never-ending source of hee hee – but we’re not talking about these  walking cadavers.
Nosiree – we’re talkin’ ’bout Sir Charles and Miss Izz!

mmm Hmmmm — those two fierce bitches could get things done!

Charles Barkley visited The Tonight Show last week and told Jay Leno that he was considering running for mayor of his hometown of Leeds, Alabama because there are ‘too many crooks on the City Council”. We were all ‘yay and stuff’ because CB’s a hot piece who doesn’t pull his punches and we repsect the hell outta that.

Sure, he’s teased us before with talk of running for Governor of Alabama and lots of white people said he wasn’t qualified to be a politician so he should just stay in sports. But if Jesse ‘The Body’ Ventura can be governor of Minnesota and Arnold ‘The Nazi’ Schwarzenegger can be governor of California — then what’s there to stop The Round Mound of Rebound from taking the oath?

mmm Hmmmmm !!

Eddie IzzardAnd then there’s our favorite ‘action tranny’ – Eddie Izzard – who’s telling Newsweek reporters that he is so worried about the curent state of his much-beloved European Union that he may add ‘working politician’ to his sparkly, perfumed resume so he can stick his platform heel up the arse of every lazy pol currently screwing things up.

Dee-lish!

What? You can’t picture it?
Transcend!!!

Now … let your mind time-travel to the worldwide utopia created in the aftermath of the:
1.) Obama presidency, when Barry created an entirely new mathematical dialogue which solved the credit crisis, eliminated the federal deficit and righted the blighted housing landscape
2.) Clinton presidency, when HRC did away with that whole pesky primary process, gave the electoral college a complete makeover and used Barry’s groundbreaking methodology regarding astrophysics and environmental engineering to end the Global Warming trend forever

Yesssss … and now on to the time when President Barkley and Prime Ministress Izzard are the big swinging dicks of the G8; the time when the emerging markets of Haiti and Darfur are the hot topics among economic heavyweights and the nearly lost, ancient art of reading is fashionable once again …

What? You still  can’t picture it?
Me either — that’s what happens when I do too much kitty flipping in one day.

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Entry filed under: blogging, entertainment, fun, funny, Gossip, life, News, Politics, unbelievable, Uncategorized. Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , .

Dumb bitch makes headlines You mean it wasn’t true love?!?

4 Comments

  • 1. eduardoestrelladr  |  April 22, 2008 at 10:04 pm

    haha your first line had me rolling. nice entry.

  • 2. lifeisacookie  |  April 22, 2008 at 10:20 pm

    oh, to dream a little dream 😉

  • 3. Noni  |  April 23, 2008 at 4:02 am

    I feel soiled just having read that …

  • 4. shell  |  April 23, 2008 at 9:54 pm

    > I feel soiled just having read that …

    That’s not dirt, Noni, it’s just how the cookie crumbles 🙂

    shell


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