Dumb bitch makes headlines

April 21, 2008 at 5:21 pm 7 comments

MySpace logoNewspaper headline:
Port St. Lucie teen worried her nude pictures will be on MySpace

Story (nutshell version):
Boy gets girl.
Girl lets boy take nudie pics of her.
Boy loses girl.
Boy threatens to show girl’s vajayjay and tatas to any MySpacers who want to see them.
Girl drags police into her breakup drama.

Editorial Comment:
ZZZzzzzzzzzz ….

Sorry, but in all honesty – who doesn’t  have nude photos floating around out there somewhere? What makes this original? What makes this news?!? (God knows the rag that ran this ‘story’ didn’t tell us …)

Unless the photog was 25 or 42 or something or he had to drug her or beat her into submission to get his Kodak moment on, then she’s just a dumb, skanky high school bitch who let herself get used by a horny high school skeeze.
Think before you say something stupid
Which is, umm, like not news ‘n stuff …

Get over it toots and go back to class — and a little word to the wise:
If you’re gonna act all prudish and nun-y all of a sudden over your exposing yourself possibly getting  exposed – then the guys are totally gonna label you a cocktease … and then what are you gonna do about prom?

Yup, you’re fucked … but that’s pretty obvious to everyone by now, right?

Entry filed under: blogging, entertainment, fun, funny, Gossip, life, News, unbelievable, Uncategorized. Tags: , , , , , .

This is nuts! Wishful thinking


  • 1. Sheldon R.  |  April 21, 2008 at 9:37 pm

    >who doesn’t have nude photos floating around out there somewhere?

    Anyone who’s smart, for reasons this story clearly illustrates.


    p.s. What would Freud make of the fact that you constantly refer to the Palm Beach Post in this blog as a rag, yet you follow it closely enough to notice a short article in the Local section of its Treasure Coast edition? Clearly, the “rag” reference is an inside joke — one which I now get 🙂

  • 2. lifeisacookie  |  April 22, 2008 at 3:31 pm

    I generally refer to all newspapers as rags. It’s a term of endearment!

  • 3. Sheldon R.  |  April 22, 2008 at 9:32 pm

    > I generally refer to all newspapers as rags. It’s a term of endearment!

    Yeah, I know; that was more self-satisfied teasing, now that I get the “inside baseball” nature of the comment 🙂


  • 4. lifeisacookie  |  April 22, 2008 at 10:02 pm

    I am, umm, “positive’ that I have, umm, “‘no idea” what you’re, eh, “talking’ about”

  • 5. girlofwords  |  April 23, 2008 at 3:03 pm

    The subhead on this story, would have been my child, would be:

    “Area Mom Removes Daughter’s Splee with Cheap Knife from Sizzler.”

    Fucking hell.

    (I put you on my blog roll … People should be reading your stuff. Haha. 🙂 I get withdrawal when I don’t.)

  • 6. shell  |  April 23, 2008 at 9:51 pm

    > I am, umm, “positive’ that I have, umm, “‘no idea” what you’re,
    > eh, “talking’ about”

    That’s a good story to stick to as you blog from your “undisclosed location” somewhere in South Florida 🙂

    Much love, Cookie…


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This is the shit you bitches are reading

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