Lookin’ for a personal payday
June 30, 2008
So this morning’s ‘BIG ENTERTAINMENT INDUSTRY NEWS’ is that another celebrity is being sued for millions over what appears to be a non-incident.
ZZzzzzzzzz
Yup -Â some no-name, greedy bitch looking to cash in a slight brush with fame flight attendant is suing Jenny Who Now Owns The Block for a few million smackers over a dog-bite incident that happened … ya …
TWO YEARS AGO.
::: Pause while The Cookie rolls her eyes, raises a hand and brings the ‘bitch, please!’Â :::
Oh, but it’s no joke.
Lisa Wilson is suing Jennifer Lopez for a $5 million, claiming J-Ho’s guard dog Floyd (Floyd?!?!?) bit her on the leg (TWO YEARS AGO).
Wilson says the bite (TWO YEARS AGO)Â caused her to fall so badly that she needed back surgery, which is totally what is keeping her from working (TWO YEARS LATER).
::: Again – ‘bitch, please!’Â :::
What? Did she fall OUT of the plane?!?
Lisa, honey? Listen to The Cookie:
Drag that limp-limb down to the nearest Workforce Alliance office and get yourself a J.O.B.
I feel for all souls who suffer at the hands, errr, teeth of another but darlin’ – you can’t bring the ‘OWW, my leg’ two years after the fact and still expect me (or anyone else) to give a flying fig about your dumbass, frivolous claim.
‘Kay, pumpkin?
Having been there myself – I rightly call bullshit on your story.
Ayep …
- 1987
- Dog show
- Columbus, Georgia
- Akita
- Hospital stay
- Eighty-seven stitches
- Lost half left tricep
- Neck, ear, arm, hand, back scarring
And what was I doing two years after that?
FINISHING COLLEGE, beeyatch!
You wanna get paid, Lisa baby?
Get a job.
Entry Filed under: Gossip, News, blogging, entertainment, fun, funny, life, odd, unbelievable. Tags: actress, aggressive, airplane, attack, behavior, bite, comedy, damages, dog attack, dog bite, eat, family, flight, flight attendant, German Shepherd, humor, jennifer lopez, law, lawsuit, lisa wilson, million, money, pet, random, sarcasm, satire, singer, stupid, sue, thoughts, writing.
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1.
flyingcrispi | June 30, 2008 at 10:00 pm
Maybe she got rabbies…
And what happened that the dog hurt you so badly?
2.
lifeisacookie | July 1, 2008 at 12:20 pm
In my teens I worked for a dog handler. We were at a show and I was getting ready to hand off the akita as my boss was coming out of the golden retriever ring and the akita got agitated and, well, lost his shit with me holding the leash. Even running like the wind through the show hall, he was faster – jumped on my back and knocked me to the ground. To this day, I remember the entire incident in slow motion. Odd, eh?
3.
flyingcrispi | July 1, 2008 at 3:01 pm
Wow. (that’s all I can say, couldn’t think of anything better, sorry).
Do you still like dogs?
4.
lifeisacookie | July 1, 2008 at 3:16 pm
To quote a movie I love … ‘Yeah, I like dags’
I couldn’t have one around me for about 10 years — but I’m ok with ones I know now.
5. Dog Tails » Lookinâ&hellip | July 1, 2008 at 9:34 pm
[...] eyes, raises a hand and brings the ‘bitch, please!’ ::: Oh, but it’s no joke. L Source: http://lifeisacookie.wordpress.com/2008/06/30/lookin-for-a-personal-payday/ Jul 02, 2008 | | Dog [...]